Today, shockingly, I learned two people I know are either getting divorced or already are. An older couple that I have known for over ten years, and a couple that are very good fiends of my oldest son and daughter-in-law. Was it a covenant or a contract that they recognized between them?
It amazes me still, how we so quickly find another significant other, throw in the towel and think the grass is greener on the other side. Years of being together with the one you once were attracted to, heavily in love with and felt you must spend the rest of your life with seem to mean nothing when the going gets rough and tough.
Since God ordained marriage, there is no way of taking Him out of this event. Marriage is between two people, a man and a woman. Not a contract between two business partners, but rather a covenant between husband and wife. Marriage is something far more than a piece of paper between two people. It is actually a covenant between each person and almighty God. The two are united and made ‘one flesh’. This is a supernatural act that was not invented by any human, but created and put into existence by God Himself. It is a holy institution between husband and wife. It cannot be easily broken or taken lightly when one or both parties wants to bail out, and it is not taken lightly by God either.
In Malachi, God says He hates divorce. Such a strong word for a man filled with unconditional love and compassion for people. This institution was never meant to be broken. It was meant to last for a lifetime.
Look at the damage divorce causes in both parties. Immediately as well as many years down the road. The effects of this decision are still taking their toll on everyone involved. Not to mention the heartache it brings to children that can’t understand how mommy and daddy are no longer together. It even changes these same children’s idea of marriage one day. What a toll is takes on the family.
Marriage takes work, a lot of work is what my twenty-six year old son, married for seven years now, told me tonight. The feelings are not the same twenty years down the road. There is security in knowing the same man or woman you have married, has devoted their life to you, and chosen to love you ‘until death do you part’. So often, The man goes out of his way to win the woman’s heart, until the vows are spoken, and then he has conquered. The woman expends every bit of energy to serve her man, until the vows are spoken and then she grows weary of this medial task. What happened? What changed? Was it possibly the whole idea of marriage they had in the first place?
Marriage must be seen as a covenant between man/woman and God and eachother. A covenant is not like a contract, it was never meant to be broken. The repercussions are endless and exhausting. So many lives, innocent lives are affected. Once happy families are ripped apart, shattered lives take years to be mended, if at all, and hopes and dreams are crushed beneath the feet of those who once dared to hope and dream for themselves.
Think long and hard, before attempting to break this covenant. Especially with almighty God. The law may permit such a thing, but God says from the beginning it was not so. It happens now, because of the hardness of hearts. Coldness sets in and blinds couples from the truth. The enemy comes in like a flood and speaks lies to children and as families try to pick up the pieces, identities are lost, parents go their separate ways, honorable, abandoned, children, broken, hearts, pain, commitment, devotiochildren feel broken and are abandoned, thrown away and forgotten like worn out furniture.
Marriage is honorable by all. When broken, it is a dishonor even to society. Divorce is serious. It is final and requires a lot of energy and work. Why not put this energy and work into restoring the marriage instead of ending it. When a couple divorces, it is not over. A new life has just begun, and that new life will one day have to reconcile with the old life. Involuntarily or not. It will have to happen. Confrontation will occur, pain will rise and not be put out. Regret will set in, and so will the realization that there was a better way.
Marriage is a covenant, a statement of lifelong commitment and devotion. It provides security and stability that a man and woman cannot find anywhere else on earth. Covenant or contract? Will you realize the difference before it’s too late?