By Gerry Restrivera
Most extramarital affairs happen at work, there are reports saying that around 50% of affairs happen at work. It is not uncommon for a married person to get romantically involved with someone at work. Most people spend a large amount of their time at work with their co-workers and the workplace is a perfect place where romance between colleagues could start. It can be really scary to know that office extramarital affairs is very common.
How office extramarital affairs get started?
Office extramarital affairs could start innocently through friendship or great chemistry at work. People at work experience the same pressures, hardships, they have common goals and they even celebrate their victories together. They eat together, sometimes travel together and eventually they share or talk not only about work but also about their personal lives. They can develop great bond and camaraderie by working every single day together. They are like soldiers going to the same battlefield everyday and we all know that soldiers often have strong bond with each other. This camaraderie can develop into something deeper through time, the friendship may become emotional intimacy especially to those of the opposite sex. Eventually they will find themselves comparing their co-worker from their spouses and find their co-worker more appealing, more understanding, more appreciative, more fun, more exciting, etc. Because of this emotional attachment, they will begin to share feelings and things that they supposed to share only to their spouses. They may also end up calling or texting each other even after work or worst meeting each other privately outside work. This emotional affair can blossom into physical affair but even though it stays in the emotional affair level, it is also a form of cheating and the impact on your marriage is the same as committing sexual infidelity.
No one is safe because office extramarital affair can happen to anyone unless you have a conscious effort to avoid it.
How to protect yourself from office extramarital affair?
Avoid the temptation. Have the conscious effort to not put yourself in a situation where you could be tempted to get involved with office extramarital affair. For instance, if a business travel came up, as much as possible avoid traveling with an office mate of the opposite sex. If it is unavoidable to travel with a colleague of the opposite sex, avoid being alone with your co-worker when traveling. Do not only hang out or befriend co-workers of the opposite sex but blend your circle of friends with people of the same gender as yours or preferably have more married couples as friends.
Set boundaries with co-workers of the opposite sex. Although it cannot be avoided to work with colleagues of the opposite sex, office extramarital affairs can be avoided if you will set boundaries. You are married and no longer single and there are things that you cannot do now. In everything you do, you have to remember that you are already married. Getting emotionally intimate with a co-worker of the opposite sex is disrespecting and cheating your spouse. Always put yourself in the shoes of your spouse and ask yourself if what you are going to do or say with your colleague can affect your marriage.
Have a regular date night and conversation with your spouse. The routine of a married life could make marriage less exciting. Sometimes couples are so pre-occupied with their work and household responsibilities that romance takes a backseat. To avoid office extramarital affairs, have a regular date night and time alone with your spouse to communicate better and to strengthen your marriage.
Be open and honest with your spouse. People who keep secrets from their spouses are more likely to disclose the secret to their office mates and this could develop into something romantic if they are of the opposite sex. Avoid the temptation of confiding to friends at work by being open and honest to your spouse. If you are getting close with an office mate of the opposite sex, it is best to talk about it with your spouse to prevent things from getting out of hand.
Make your spouse your best friend. Your spouse is not just your spouse but she or he can be your best friend too. No one can love you and protect you more than your spouse and so your spouse is the perfect best friend that you can have. Friends go through hardships together, play together and celebrate together so do these things with your spouse and not with another person outside your marriage. Of course aside from growing together, it is also beneficial to grow individually and do things with other people than your spouse but like what was mentioned earlier, set your boundaries and though you can have fun with other people, you best friend should always be your spouse. If your spouse is your best friend, office extramarital affairs will not find its way to you.
Value your marriage. Spouses are tempted to cheat because they do not put high value to their marriage. It is important that after God, the most important thing in your life is your marriage, after all, it is a union blessed by the Higher Power. If you value your marriage, you will not do things to dishonor your marriage and you will not ruin the trust of your spouse. Engaging in an office extramarital affair is not only disrespecting your marriage but it is putting your marriage at risk. Infidelity is the main cause of divorce and if you do not want to experience the pain of divorce, you have to avoid office extramarital affairs.
Is your marriage shattered by an affair? Although infidelity is the most shattering experience a marriage can go through, it is still possible to make a marriage work after an affair. Find out how, visit Saving a Troubled Relationship
To know more about love and relationship visit The Best Love Guide.
Gerry Restrivera writes informative articles on various subjects including Office Extramarital Affair- How Safe Are You and Your Marriage from Office Affairs.