Mary Nkirote, a domestic violence survivor from Kenya, recently shared her story of marital bliss gone sour and deadly. Her husband did the unthinkable but to God be the glory, she is able to share and encourage others with her experience.
I have no idea how long it took for the emotions I had locked away to begin to rise to the surface. Having the freedom to feel and express emotions at all seemed foreign. The grief was overwhelming ...
Nobody understands abusive relationships unless they have been in that situation. It is pointless to explain to people why we stayed in that relationship. These abusers take all of our self-esteem, our confidence, then they slowly take our family and friends away.
If your husband is not loving you as Christ loves the church and is increasingly being abusive toward you, then he has become your enemy. He has set himself up as an adversary against you. In the Hebrew language, adversary is translated as Satan. Yes, your abusive pastor-husband has made himself a Satan in your life.
Women suffer in silence for various reasons. They may be ashamed or embarrassed to let the world know that they are being violated. Wrong social attitudes especially in eastern countries are imbibed from childhood. In a survey conducted by the International Institute of Population Studies in India, 54% of women thought it was alright for women to be beaten by their husbands. 51% of men thought so too.
Instead of stopping to reevaluate her life, Holland continued her romantic pursuits, spending the next two years going to clubs with friends. It was never a sexual thing, she says, but a desire to be found special and desirable. Though by now she distrusted men, she felt she was living a fairy tale in search of Prince Charming, thinking that finding the right mate would complete her.
However, it did come out in court that Kevin had an "explosive anger" problem. Family members and two psychologists attested to this. One even gave a name for it; while the other agreed Kevin had an anger problem but was unwilling to give it a label. Both psychologists agreed that Kevin showed no signs of mental illness. Kevin's issues stemmed from childhood where he'd explode for no apparent reason.
We had all begged, prayed, complained, reported, and fought, just to get him to stop beating her. I was tired of seeing the black eye, the swollen face, and the bruised arms, and hearing about the constant headaches. It was so bad that I had to tell him that one day he would do something really bad to his wife and end up behind bars. Little did I know that the day in question was fast approaching.
When they found Rosa she was unconscious and barely breathing. She had stab wounds in her back, she had been raped and beaten, and a jagged piece of wood had been shoved into her vagina. Official reports said the 35-year-old single mother, who had been studying to finish high school, had been impaled.