I had just finished college and was on a journey of self discovery. My routine for 18 years was going to school and having everyone do things for me. It was a really tough period in my life because I was staying with my mum who constantly pressured me to get a job. I later did with tears in my heart.
At this time, I really didn’t have a lot of friends as most of them were friends I made in school. This was how I started seeking and yearning for companionship. Let me state although I grew up in a home where Christian principles were highly upheld I pretty much had an epileptic relationship with God.
I met a girl on a dating app and we really connected on many levels. We started out as friends which I was comfortable with but at some point, she started pressing for a relationship. I knew I wasn’t ready but with a lot of peer pressure, I finally asked her out. Deep down within I knew that a relationship wasn’t good for me at that point in time but all the same, I stuck my head into it.
I knew sex before marriage was wrong as stated in the Bible but things got so hot in the relationship we had sex a couple of times. Trust me, God kept speaking to me to leave the relationship but I was too engrossed and consumed with fleshly lust to listen. I was sure I had found my soul mate. We couldn’t go a day without talking to each other – it was a sin to be apart.
For 3 years I struggled to level up in the relationship; we had issues on 2 occasions. I thought it was my opportunity to break up as God told me but I went back begging. I was unequally yoked but finding it difficult to unyoke! During our third year of dating, I was looking through her phone one day and found out she was seeing another guy. I confronted her and it ended up becoming a big fight.
This was heart wrenching for me because it was my first relationship and I put in so much effort and time to make it work. Shockingly, what I put three years into, ended in minutes. I wasn’t going to church or even praying at this time so depression set in.
I tried begging her to come back but she refused. I decided to move to another city hoping I would be better mentally and emotionally. I am glad my heeded to my heart as that was where I got a worked on and strengthened my relationship with God.
No sooner, I started talking to a girl who always invited me to church with her. I obliged, went with her to church and we became good friends for about 2 years. Today, we are married with a kid. God’s time is truly the best!
I hope this helps many to know that sometimes what you want isn’t good for you. Only God knows what’s good for you. It is better to wait for your appointed time so you don’t end up disillusioned and hurt by what wasn’t yours in the first place.
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